The Immortal Anecdote
by CaptainNightingale
Summary: We all know that D's favorite thing is hunting vampires, but what's his second favorite? Oh yeah. It's saving gorgeous women. Only now he may have saved someone even stronger than himself. Will he be the one getting saved now? Or will she cause his death?
1. Chapter 1

Author's note: Hello! This is my first fanfic, so thank you so much for reading! On that note, if you have an opinion (I'm sure you do) about anything at all- my grammar, you love a scene, you hate a character, anything!- _please_ tell me about it. My goal is to make you happy and keep you coming back for more. Enjoy!

P.S. I don't own D, or any other dhampirs for that matter.

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><p>1<p>

On any other day, this forest would have been beautiful. The splendor of the trees was never marred by a dying leaf, and not a single thorn covered the beauty of the wildflowers spotting the forest floor. Today, however, this enchanted forest was only a meaningless background for a truly gorgeous image. A young man, only twenty-five at the most, had wandered into the forest. His perfect snow white skin contrasted marvelously against his flowing ebony hair, which was covered by a wide-brimmed hat. He wore the dark armor of a hunter, and his black cape billowed slightly against the crescent long sword on his back. The forest was silent, as if all occupants were captivated by the face that would break the hearts of angels and demons alike. Suddenly, a voice too harsh and gravelly to have come from this god of night broke the silence.

"Where the hell are we?" rang out the mysterious voice. Silence was the reply of the gorgeous youth. "I can tell you right now, wherever this is, it's bad. There's some kind of magic here. Magic! You hear me? Now, I know you're a bit of a dolt when it comes to staying out of trouble, but I think even you can figure out that this-"

"Enough." The man's reply was surprisingly calm compared to the other voice, which sounded edgy and tense at the situation. However, his unintentionally seductive voice was heard by the forest, and it shuddered as a young woman would at the same voice. The shudder did not go unnoticed.

"Ha! See? Magic! It's covering this place. I _strongly_ suggest that we about face and get out of here!" shouted the voice. Was it coming from the man's hand?

The youth ignore the voice and continued forward on his steed. After a few moments, the man came upon a trail, as if the forest had simply stepped out of his way. The youth could feel the will of the forest begging him to take the trail provided. Slowly, he turned his horse upon the path and urged it forward. The horse shied, and there was an agitated voice muttering about the horse containing intelligence vastly superior to that of the young man's. The rider urged the horse again, and this time it obediently took the path. Eventually coming to a small grove, the man stopped. His stunning silver eyes surveyed the scene and rested upon the form of a sleeping girl, perhaps a few years younger than the man. Silently dismounting, the man walked closer to the girl when something caught his eye. A silver dagger, finely jeweled and intricately carved had been stabbed into the ground. He quietly stooped to retrieve the blade, and a small sizzling noise came from his hand. Had the knife burned him? Placing the dagger in the many folds of his cape, the youth returned his attention to the girl. Laying in a bed of lilies, the girl was a vision of beautiful serenity. Her long hair acted as a blanket of silver and gold for her lightly tanned skin, and she wore a silver necklace with a pendant hidden by the neckline of her pure white nightgown.

"Well would you look at that! She's as pretty as you, D! Yet here she is, all alone, asleep, and in nothing but that little gown... C'mon, I know what you're thinking..." Right as the gravelly voice said that, the man stooped and reached out a hand to move the girl's necklace. "Hey! I was kidding! You can't just-"

"What's wrong with her?" the youth apparently known as D asked. His hand had stopped before reaching the necklace, and he had lost interest in it.

"Hm? Oh, right. Looks like some sort of sleeping curse. She should be fine if she just gets out of here, though."

Without another word, D lifted the girl in his arms and placed her on the horse's saddle. Silently lifting himself up behind her, he pulled her close to keep her from falling off. With her head against his chest, a sigh of content escaped the girl's raspberry lips. As they left the forest, the same mysterious voice could be heard saying, "You just love a good damsel in distress, don't you?"

000

_Where the flip am I? _I wondered lazily. _Hm... Trees. Multiple trees, in fact. So... a forest. _Great Scott, I was a regular Sherlock. After shaking off the general grogginess that ten years of sleep can do to someone, I surveyed my surroundings a little more thoroughly. I had already deduced that I was in a forest, but it wasn't _my_ forest. The forest I had slept in had fed off of my power while I slept. It was thing of beauty, power, and mystery. This was a forest of... of... well, regular stuff. Looking up from my regal bed of dirt I noticed that, not only was I surrounded by trees, I was also _under_ a tree. The ancient Mydia trees of the Frontier are known for their elevated root systems, which lift them approximately thirty feet off of the forest floor. So that was it. I was in the Mydian Forest, exactly three days of travel (if you were a skilled rider, which, heck yeah, I was) north of my forest. The forest that, quite frankly, was not the place I wanted to be.

_What else is there?_ I gazed around some more and noticed the reason that I was so very far from where I used to be. A man. Sleeping (thank God) a few mere feet from me with his face covered by a traveler's hat and the biggest freakin' sword I had ever seen. I frowned. _What is the polite thing to do upon waking scantily clad next to a sleeping young man? Well, I should probably assume that he saved me, so killing him in his sleep is a "no". For now. But... watching him while he sleeps is obsessive and creepy. _After deciding what _not_ to do, I ended up aimlessly wandering around the forest, getting distracted by a flowery vine, and carefully weaving it into my waist-length hair. Five minutes had passed.

_Egad! I'm so booored._ Luckily for me, I suddenly heard voices from where I had left the young man. Visibly perking at the thought of entertainment, I silently stood and headed back. As I peeked around the root of the tree, I saw three men in full hunter regalia. Two of them were a full head taller than the other and had pale washed-out eyes partially covered by platinum bangs. They were most likely twins. The leader of the group, or at least I assumed he was the leader because of his overly confident smile, stepped towards the young man. Using the end of his rifle, he flipped the man's hat off of his face.

_Oh. My. Goodness. What a sexy, gorgeous, handsome FOX. _

"See? I told you it was him. It's gotta be. There ain't a single man in the whole Frontier as good-lookin' as him." The cocky man said as he turned back to the blondies. "Sure is a waste." He added as he turned the safety off on his gun. I decided that was the point in time where I needed to make myself known.

"I don't think you should be here," I told them in the polite yet imposing tone that I save especially for strangers and people I don't like. In this case, they were both. Startled, Mr. Cocky Murderer stepped away from the young man and I silently took his former place. While slowly crouching down for the man's sword, I continued to speak to the leader to keep him from doing anything stupid. "By the look of things, I'd say you were about to kill this man. I'm afraid I can't let you do that." As I unsheathed the sword (Holy cow, this is a _nice_ sword!) I quickly added, "Now, before you try anything, I think it's only fair that I should warn you: If you upset me, I will kill all of you without hesitation or remorse."

There was a pause. The leader, rifle practically forgotten in his grasp, continued to stare, while only one of the blonde men had the good sense to take his broad sword off of his back. The leader glanced at the end of my sword, which I held comfortably by my side. I knew my way around a blade, and he could tell. As his gaze returned to mine, I held it. Ever since I was twelve, people didn't feel very comfortable making eye contact with me, and I knew it. As the seconds ticked by under my gaze, the man started to fidget.

_Come on! Try something. I dare you. I double-dare you! _And to my surprise, try something he did. He laughed. _Oh. No! He did not. I don't care what he does now. That man is going to die. _He continued to laugh. I could feel my grip on the sword's handle tighten and I glared at him.

"Oh, I get it!" He snickered. "So, what are you? His little snack in between towns? How much did he have to pay the whorehouse so he could keep you?" By now, the twins had decided to join in the fun and were having a grand ole time laughing their heads off.

One of the twins decided to chime in and cackled, "Hey, just let us finish him off and you can come with us." Lewd smiles sprang up on each of their unwashed faces. "I promise we'll be sweeter to you than he'll ever be."

_A concubine. They think I'm a concubine. A harlot. A slut. A lady of the evening! _That was it then. They had upset me. I would kill them all. I moved so quickly that before any of them could register it, I was kneeling directly in front of their leader. Like a flash of white light, I swung the sword horizontally and bisected him. Then, seeing as I was already down there anyway, I swung a leg out and tripped the twin that had been smart enough to take out his sword. Rising to my feet, I kicked the man's sword out of his hand and loomed over him.

"P-please. Wait, I-" He pleaded while grabbing my ankle. I turned and decapitated him in one swift motion. The second twin was the only one left, the one that had invited me to join them. He was staring at me with his back to a fiery sunset in the west, the vibrant red sun matching the blood dripping off the sword.

_Pretty... No! Focus. You're in the middle of slaughtering people. _What can I say? I get distracted by beauty. I returned my attention to the man. He hadn't moved at all. _Hm... Frozen with fear? It wouldn't be the first time._ I frowned at him. Striking fear into the hearts of men isn't always what it's cracked up to be. As I stepped over the corpse of his fallen brother, his survival instincts kicked in and he wielded his broadsword in both hand and swung at me. Raising the sword, I deflected his attack and stepped to the side. It was almost funny that I hadn't realized what a _giant_ the man was until he was lobbing a sword at my head. Almost. He was swinging wildly now, and all I could do was simply parry each blow and try not to trip over his twin. Becoming frustrated, he raised his sword above his head and struck it against the blade which I had managed to place a few inches from my face.

"You killed my brother!" he shrieked, taking me off guard. His fury was pushing him forward, and he pressed down harder with the blade. I pushed back and pressed on until his outstretched arms were parallel with his nose. Alarmed by my apparent strength, the man gaped at me. "What are you?"

Meeting his eyes for the first time, I replied, "I'm different," and used my free hand to rip out his throat. As he fell, I flicked the blood of the blade with a swift snap of the wrist and turned around to run straight into the gorgeous young man.


	2. Chapter 2

Welcome to Chapter 2! This one's really a bunch of talking. My bad. I promise actual exciting events will begin to unfurl soon. Also, I think I should be getting these up on a rather timely basis, what with it being summer, and my being a total nerd. Without further ado, enjoy!

P.S. If anyone would like to beta for me, that'd be super swell.

**Disclaimer: **I don't own D.

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><p>2<p>

I looked up at the young man from where I was standing, which just so happened to be pressed against his chest due to my running into him. He was probably right at one foot taller than me, and five foot nine inches is nothing to blow your nose at, mind you. _Oh God, I love tall people._ For a moment, I simply stared at him. I would reprimand myself later for my rudeness. His features were absolute perfection. _He's so _pretty._ Still! While I am one to appreciate beauty, I am not one to fawn over it, or press myself against it. _With that pointed hint from myself, a well-placed step put a modest three feet between us. After spending some time being utterly fascinated with the ground, I looked up and asked with my typical hint of a refined Southern accent, "If I may be so bold as to inquire, were you the one that saved me?"

There was a pause, and then in a deep, mellifluous voice, he replied, "Yes," and then added as an afterthought, "I am D, the hunter."

"D? D... Yes, of course." _He seems so familiar. How would I know him? _Shaking myself out of my thoughts, I crossed one foot in front of the other and took a deep bow. "It is an honor to meet you D. I am Lily." Immediately after introducing myself, all self-restraint was lost and I leapt at him. He was secured in my grasp and after planting a kiss on his cheek I nestled my face into his neck a hugged him even harder. "Thank you so much for saving me! You're such a sweetheart!" _Huh... From this close, he smells like sweltering Noble blood... Ah! He's a dhampir. Cute. _D coughed. _Do dhampirs cough? Oh. He's uncomfortable. Got it. _I quietly released him from my possibly unwanted hug. He was staring at me. _Well, now we're both uncomfortable._

"So..." I started, trying to think of something to say. It was probably for the best that I typically got zero social interaction. I'm bad at it, and I typically would rather be utterly alone than have to communicate with someone. Like right now, for example. "Er... How are you?" _Alright, Lily. Stick with the classics. _

"Why were you cursed?" he asked. _Hey! He's as socially inept as me! Yaaay._

"You know, I think it's super cute how you can be quiet, yet incredibly demanding at the same time," I teased. His masculine lips became an annoyed line. "What? It's your own fault, anyway. If one person is going to be deadly serious in a conversation, than the other should be deadly ridiculous. We have to maintain a balance," I informed him with nod of serenity and wisdom.

"Why were you cursed?" he repeated. I sighed loudly.

"D, D, D. Darling, delightful, dreamy, deliciously dashing D. If ever I ignore your question, or if I give an irritatingly vague answer, it means I'm not going to tell you." I paused a moment, then, getting lost in my own world, muttered to myself, "My situation is nobody's burden but my own."

"..." was D's considerate response.

"Thoughtfully and eloquently said, my friend. Now then, unless you have any other fascinating speeches to give, I would like to prepare dinner."

"Oh, _wow,_ D! You sure do know how to pick 'em!" a voice chortled from D's hip. In a flash, I reached out and grabbed D's left hand. Slowly, I brought the appendage to my face and stared intently at the palm. Besides the fact that the hand was as striking as the rest of D, with a lean palm and elegantly long fingers, it was completely ordinary. I glared at it.

"Don't you hide from me," I demanded as I arched a perfect eyebrow at the hand. Slowly, the palm started to squirm and a small (pardon me but rather disgusting) face appeared and smiled at me. "Well I'll be," I muttered. The face laughed again. Then, remembering my manners, I added, "How do you do?"

"I'm havin' a blast, thanks to you! You know, I was starting to believe there wasn't a single person on the Frontier that was brave enough to sass old hard-ass over here," the carbuncle said with a grin. After that snide comment, I laughed like there was no tomorrow. D took his hand away from me and tightly clenched his fist. I pouted at him.

"Aw... C'mon, David." _D could stand for David, right? _"Don't be so serious all the time. You're immortal! You've got all the time in the world to do whatever you want!" Right as I finished saying that, a terrifying miasma rolled off of D in waves, forcing me to inch away from him and my survival instincts to scream _Kill him now, before it's too late!_. I quickly ignored my instincts, but decided to keep the extra distance, just in case. "Um... Is something wrong?"

"How did you know about that?" he asked. His voice alone was bitter enough to send a chill down my spine. Internally, I was thrilled at the thought of having someone as fear-inducing as D around. You were never bored with a man like that. Of course, I didn't dare choose then to show my excitement, what with him trying to kill me with his eyes.

"What? About you being a dhampir?" His aura of unholy suppressed rage thickened. _I'll take that as a yes. _"Well, besides the fact that you sleep during the day, and that you're so blindingly gorgeous I'm surprise people don't die when they look at you..." I paused to give him a way-to-make-things-super-obvious look, "I can smell you." After waiting for him to give a response, which he must only give out when the stars are properly aligned, I continued, "You see, Noble blood already has a delicious aroma, but then when you mix it with hot human blood," I kissed my fingertips the way a chef would, "Magnifico!". It was true. In my opinion, dhampirs are the best smelling thing in the entire world. Mmmm... Half-breeds...

D continued to remain silent. _He's so quiet. He'd make a great librarian. _"Immortality isn't as pleasant as you think it is," he declared with a hint of sorrow.

"What? Oh, that," _Seriously, D. That was at least ten minutes ago. Maybe he doesn't talk much because he's slow... _"Trust me, Dexter," I drawled, "Immortality can be one eternal vacation. You just gotta learn how to live. Or unlive, I suppose, for some." His stern mouth became a line. _I guess he doesn't like vampire jokes. _"Anyway! I've been around for longer than you'd think, but everyday's an adventure." I smiled at him then, as if to encourage him to smile back. He didn't.

"How old are you?" he inquired. I stepped away from him, uncomfortable. As my fingers laced themselves together, I began to gaze about our surroundings. I stared at the roots of the tree, then at D's horse, then back to the roots again. Everything received my full attention as I refused to my eye contact with the imposing young hunter directly in front of me. "I'm not going to ask again," he announced firmly.

"I don't want to tell you," I huffed, putting my hands on my hips. "You'll feel all threatened, tell the sheriff, and then I'll have a horde of villagers running me out of town!" I exclaimed.

A cackle came from D left hand. "I think you might be thinking of something else, lady." If I could have blushed, I would have. Even if there was a sheriff, I doubt D would tell him anything. Still, it was probably better safe than sorry.

"You know," I began, feeling the need to explain my outburst, "I am the only one of my kind there has ever been and ever will be. Humans don't react very well to... _unique_ individuals. You understand that there are many things about me that are best unknown, don't you?" D nodded. Of course he did. Everyone knows that dhampirs are the most hated of all the freaks and outcasts. _At least he has others like him to be hated with. _"Now then, shall I make dinner, or do you think it's best to leave?"

In response, D strode over to his steed and lifted himself into the saddle and looked over at me to follow. As I walked over, he extended his hand to pull me up behind him.

"Um... Say... Duke?" I hesitated. "You know, I can't very easily ride side-saddle if I'm behind you." I looked at him pointedly, and he merely looked back, not catching my hint. I continued stalling, trying to let him see the problem. "Because, I mean *cough* you know... One might prefer to ride side-saddle if they were in my situation..." There was a moment of stillness as I waited for D to see what I was uncomfortable with. _Holy cow, D. It's not the freakin' Da Vinci code._

Shattering the tense silence, D finally responded, "I don't catch your meaning."

Rolling my eyes, I practically shouted, "Dang it, D. I don't wanna ride behind you because I don't want to have to wrap my legs around you!" _That right there probably makes me the only person in history that doesn't want to wrap something around D. But hey, it's one of those things that weird me out. Like feet and babies. _He clenched his left hand as tight as he could, but I could still hear Left Hand's muffled laughter. Embarrassed, I sniffed, "Well, _excuse_ _me_ for being raised a lady." D looked almost perturbed, but he quickly hid it and calmly moved his hand to pull me up to the saddle. In front of him, mind you.

"So, where to?" I questioned, instantly forgetting the previous situation as a crossed my legs and leaned my cheek against D's chest. Riding with D was probably going to be awkward, so I might as well be physically comfortable, at least.

"I'll take you to the nearest town. I don't think it's best for you to spend too much time with someone like me." _Oh, silly dhampirs. Forever alone. _There was no self-pity in his words, only a stoicism that comes with being alone for too long. I grieved for him a moment, knowing all to well that not everyone is meant for the isolation often caused by immortality. However, I soon noticed something else that was hidden within his words.

"Oh my gosh. Oh. My. Gosh. You arrogant PRICK!" I shouted at him, turning in the saddle so I could properly glare at him. I had caught that hint of sympathy people use when they know you adore them, but they aren't ever going to feel the same way. I knew what he was doing; I had done what he was doing. "You think I'm in love with you, you jerk!" I crossed my arms and twisted away from him so I wouldn't have to see his beautiful, egotistical face.

Silence passed between us, with me too put-out to talk, Left-Hand too confused for a snide comment, and D... well, being himself. Then, cautiously, D slowly muttered, "Excuse me, Lily?"

Whirling back to glare at him, I snapped, "Oh, don't you 'Excuse me, Lily?' me! I know what you're doing! You're trying to let me down easy by ditching me in some town. So, just because you're pretty, you think that I'm just gonna fall for you? Guess what. I'm. Pretty. Too. D." I accentuated each word by jabbing him in the chest. _Ouch. Why don't I just punch a wall? It might actually hurt less. _"Just because every other woman _and I'm sure some men_ instantly become addicted to you, it doesn't mean you can just assume the whole world's in love with you!" With a huff, I added, "I'm a flippin' immortal. I think I have a little self-restraint." Exasperated, I turned back around and leaned against his chest. Yes, I was still mad, but there was no sense in me not making myself comfortable. Quiet again. _I slept for ten years. Let's see who can out-silence the other, dhampir._

"I believe you misunderstood me," came D's velvety voice. There was another pause. You had to be incredibly patient to hold up a conversation with him. "I imagine you should be making your way back home. I'm sure there are people waiting for you."

For a while, I simply sat there; I felt bad about yelling at him now. Not just because I _may_ have flipped out at him for no reason, but also because of the subtle twinge of jealousy I heard when he mentioned that I had people waiting for me. _He doesn't have anyone. _I would have cried, but then again, I don't do that.

I waited to make sure he had nothing else to say, then, nonchalantly, I answered, "No. There's not a soul waiting for me. My family died ages ago, everyone I've ever met I've left behind, and it's not even safe for me to return home, yet." I sighed. I didn't mind being alone, but not having a house sucked. As I reminisced about the failures and betrayals that had left me in my homeless state, rage quietly flaring against my adversaries, D was completely forgotten.

That is, until he simply stated, "Then I suppose we'll stay together for a while."

I turned around to stare at him, shocked. Bamboozled. Flabbergasted. I hadn't stayed with someone in -insert absurdly long amount of time here-. Reaching my arms around him to pull him into an awkward two-people-sitting-on-a-horse hug, I laughed, "You know, Darcy, underneath your stoic expression, icy gaze, and whatever the flip this bondage get-up is made out of, you're a really nice guy."

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><p>That's it! I hope you liked it! Even if you didn't, please leave a comment! It would make me feel so pretty :3<p> 


	3. Chapter 3

Disclaimer: I don't own D.

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><p>3<p>

After a night of travel, we finally arrived in the tiny, impressively boring town of Landerville. A narrow dirt road (which probably led to an equally unexciting place) cut through the center of town, with watch towers flanking both ends. As D rode toward the tower, a guard called out and he stopped his horse. Leaving the tower, a man warily approached us.

"What business do you have in Landerville?" he asked with all the authority a weekly volunteer could.

"We have to have business?" I asked, startling the guard. Until then, I had been concealed by D's cape, using it as a blanket while I dozed.

Trying to pass his excitement off as a cough, he responded, "Yes. Well... wait. I don't know. I think so. Everyone else has business." With that, he tried to give D a pointed look, but found that D's wide-brimmed hat made it incredibly difficult to determine where exactly his eyes were.

"We're just passing through. We need a place to stay," D told him. At the thought of food and a proper bed, a smile grew across my face. The town may have looked like a wasteland, but it's hard to screw up a proper inn. Mimicking my smile, the guard's mood rapidly changed, and he offered to take D's horse to the stables. He then told us that the saloon always had rooms available. D handed him the reigns, then offered his hand to help me dismount. As my feet silently touched the ground, the man's gaze lingered on my nightgown before he began leading the horse away. I became painfully aware of the fact that a nightgown, though shaped like a dress, is not quite the same thing. I kept D's hand in mine, and leaned into him, forcing him to share his cape.

D glanced down at me as the guard left, and asked, "Is something wrong?"

I looked up at him and frowned (some people may say 'pouted', but what do they know?), "Well, Damien, I'm afraid I'm wearing I dress that's practically see-through." The guard turned back to look at me again, and I clung to D's cape even tighter. Lowering my voice to a whisper, I added, "This is the first time I've walked into a town where people haven't all felt the need to kill me as soon as possible, and I have no idea why." My eyes narrowed at the town, displaying the complete distrust I felt for it. "Whether humans realize it or not, they can sense power. It makes them edgy, and eventually they'll run someone like me out of town."

As I glared, I noticed how very few people there were in the village, and some of the tension slowly left me. Leaving the protection of D's cloak, I commenced walking along the boardwalk of the town's shops. I kept my hold on D, however, still needing the sense of security I found with having the hunter at hand. (Get it? At hand?) Gazing lazily at the shops we passed, I noted dully how completely average the place was. _Mechanic, general store, produce... Oh my gosh, this place needs a good vampire attack, then it'd at least be interesting. _Right as I thought that, I saw the store that made up for every mundane speck of dirt in that dismal town. It was perfection. It was a lion among cats. It was _the greatest shop known to mankind. _

"Candy!" I giggled in excitement. Before D had time to react, his hand was pressed against the glass with mine as I stared eagerly into the shop. My eyes sparkled at the rainbow of colors created by the treats. I could be incredibly immature for someone my age.

"Do you like candy?" D softly asked. _Do I like candy? Do _I _like candy?_

"You bet your sweet ass I like candy!" A laugh came from Left Hand and D closed his fist. "Honestly, Dylan. Sometimes I worry about your ability to pick up on the emotions of others." With that, I lead him away from the store. The candy had reminded me of my true goal. Food. Any food. Preferably something that was once alive, though. As I walked with new fervor, D directly in tow, a girl burst from around the corner of the shop and swiftly collided with me. While I barely felt the impact, the girl had bounced back and fallen directly on her back.

"Oh! Hello little one," I said, looking down at the girl. Ok, she wasn't a "little one" per say; in fact, she was probably seventeen-ish, but when you're this old, everyone's a child. With a groan, the girl looked up at us. Well, she looked up at D. Her cheeks quickly turned forty shades of red and she leapt to her feet. Humiliated, the girl quickly brushed off her skirt and mumbled a quiet apology to the ground before running away. As she disappeared from view, I laughed, "Good golly! I think she just lost her virginity by looking at you!" Then, with an thrilled gasp, I added, "You're like David Bowie when he was in Labyrinth!" and began swinging our hands back and forth in delight.

"Who is David Bowie?" D asked. I sighed. _I'm so freaking old._

"Never mind."

000

I stared intently at the table set before me and held back an animalistic purr. As soon as D and I sat at the table I had asked the saloon waitress for everything. One look into my ravenous eyes and she knew I meant _everything._ The saloon's entire supply of meat for the day had been emptied and placed before me like an offering. D sat beside me, as seemingly aloof as ever, and I daintily picked up a knife and fork rather than going to town with my bare hands. About three steaks, five pork chops, and ten mysterious bird-like creatures later, I went over to the bartender to pay and see about a room. The lines on his decrepit face deepened, "Do you think I'm stupid, miss?"

"What? No, I-"

"Really?" he said in a low voice, "Then why do think I'm gonna go about lettin' a dhampir stay the night here?" He began to wipe off the glasses, preparing for the after work crowd that had already begun to file in.

Ignoring my queue to leave, I lied, "Listen, I know he's a great-lookin' guy and all, but that doesn't automatically make him half-vampire."

"Nope, I suppose it don't, but ya see, missy, when I was a hell-of-a-lot younger, I did some travelin', and during that travelin' I ran across I town that was havin' some vampire trouble. So, like any town, they hired a hunter. This one was supposedly the best there's ever been, a man known as D that's half-vampire himself. He was so beautiful he even made death look good. I'd never forget a face like that." He turned his gaze to D's direction.

"If you know that much about him, then you know that he's gotta be someone decent. He uses his Noble blood to help humans, not terrify them," I tried to reason with him, but I could see the prejudice within him wasn't planning on leaving. He shook his head.

"I don't care if he's helped a thousand people. A dhampir's a dhampir. That's jus' the way it is."

I moved one of my hands out of his field of view. With a muffled clink, I summoned five gold coins to the palm of my hand. "It's too bad you have to be so disagreeable. Your accent reminds me of my grandfather, so I think I would have liked you." He didn't frown at the knowledge of losing a potential friend. _Well, screw you, too, old man. _"I know that you don't admit dhampirs here. However," I placed the gold coins on the countertop, "that's the gold of the Golden Age of the Nobility. It's enough to buy half of this entire town, so I strongly urge you to make an acception."

The man looked at the coins, then at me, and then at D, who for all I knew was probably towering menacingly over a dead virgin. Hopefully not, though. Silently, the man scooped the coins into his pocket. I turned around to find D where I had left him, and thankfully sans virgin corpse. He came when I waved him over then stood patiently beside me. The bartender barked something to the back of the saloon and a teenage boy bounded from the kitchen. Taking one look at me, the freckled teen gave D a jealous glare before raking his eyes over my body.

"Can I help you?" he asked my chest. I crossed my arms in front of it, only making his eyes widen slightly.

"Show us to our room, please," D replied. The boy shot him a dirty look before realizing D was tall, gorgeous, and built like a model. So, if D was his competition, he might as well give up now. Opening the door behind him, the boy led us into a narrow hallway with doors along one side and a staircase at both ends. Choosing the closest stair, the teenager took us to relatively spacious room with a view of the town, a roaring fireplace, one large bed, and a door which most likely led to a bathroom. _One bed. _One _bed. Of course there'd only be one._

"You guys have got the nicest room in the whole place. Anything you'd need for a pleasant stay should already be here, but if you need anything, just ask for Tom." The boy lingered in the doorway, practically dazed, before blurting out, "I would pay serious cash to watch you two-"

"Thank you, Tom. That will be all!" I shoved him out of the room and locked the door. Turning to D, I said, "Who the flip says that? I mean, _out loud_? This is a bad place. This is a very bad place." I frowned at me palms where I had touched the boy. "I'm going to go wash my hands."

As I dried my hands off, I walked over to D who had taken a chair by the window. It was the first time I had ever seen him without his hat on, and if it was possible, he was even more stunning. "The bartender knows about you."

"I heard," he replied, not taking his eyes off of the peaceful scene of the moonlight on an abandoned mansion on the hill outside of town.

"Well?" I asked. _You really gotta squeeze the information out of this guy. _"What are you gonna do?"

He looked at me for a moment, his silver eyes meeting my chocolate brown ones without a hint of hate or fear. It was... nice. "Nothing," he said. "Humans have always detested my kind. There isn't anything I can do to keep them from hating what I am."

"But... D! That's not fair! _Who_ we are is never defined by _what_ we are. The fact that you're a dhampir doesn't change the fact that you're a good man!" Something warm appeared in his eyes. _He's... touched. _I mentally high-fived myself. _Plus ten friendship points!_ I smiled at him then. I didn't get one back, but hey, one step at a time. "Anyway... I'm pretty tired, so I'm off to sleep. You can have the bed." I really wanted that bed. But D had saved my life after all, and I was nothing if not a gentleman. woman. Eh... Gentleman sounds better, gender be darned.

"That's not necessary. You may have it." _Uh-oh... There's nothing more dangerous than a politeness battle. _There was about to be a great deal of "Oh, it's no trouble" and "No, really, I insist" if Left Hand hadn't spoken up.

"Why don't you just share?" he snickered. I looked at D. It was true that I had slept next to D on his horse, but sharing a bed seemed completely different. It was personal, and it was probably crossing a boundary. D said nothing, which was a shame, because this would really be a great time for him to be the first to speak. Honestly, I didn't really mind. Being a loner, I'd never shared a bed before, and I was willing to try anything once. But I was _not_ about to suggest it... Then again, if this awkward silence lasts any longer, I just might. And I _really _wanted that bed. But I also didn't want to be rude.

"I don't bite," I broke the silence. _It's funny because he's a dhampir._ D frowned at me, disapproving as ever of vampire jokes. "Just saying. I mean, I won't molest you if you won't molest me." I began to perform my looking-nervously-about-the-room-refusing-to-make-eye-contact-with-D-while-he-judges-me habit that I seemed to be picking up. There were exactly thirteen different smudges on the walls and ceiling.

"Fine."

"Fine?" _That's surprising._ "Oh. Alright, then. Um... which side do you want?" In answer to my question D walked over to the side nearest the door and laid down, sword placed over his chest. "That's how you sleep? Is it comfortable?" I asked incredulously.

"It's important for a hunter never to be taken off guard. You get used to sleeping like this," he answered from his side, which looked more and more like a death bed, thanks to his position.

"Pfft! I've hunted vampires, and I've never slept like that. There's such a thing as pajamas, you know. And I have _never_ worn shoes to bed. That's just odd." After switching off the lights, I waltzed over to the bed and climbed under the covers which D had neglected.

"You've hunted vampires?" he asked, a hint of surprise in his typically emotionless voice.

"G'night, D!"

000

_I was in the grove again. The rain clouds made the sky a deep purple, and the wind blew my hair around my face. As the rain pounded against burgundy wildflowers, the red dripped off of them, like blood dripping from pale skin. I looked down to find an old iron collar around my throat with a chain leading off into the shadow of the forest. Just then, laughter sounded over the wind and rain, and a vampire with dark brown hair and a cruel smile stepped out of the forest. I rose to try and escape, but the end of the chain was gripped tightly in his hand. _

_"Oh, Lily. I do wish you'd stop trying to run from me," he smile. Crushing the wildflowers underfoot, he walked over to me and whispered in my ear. "No matter where you go, and no matter how far you run, I will find you. You are mine now, Lily, and I will have you with me."_

My eyes flew open. The grove was gone, and I was back in the bed at the saloon. Glancing up, I saw that my head was resting on D's chest, and I had nestled up against him while I slept. _Hm... Apparently, I like to cuddle. Duly noted. _I gently pushed myself away from the sleeping hunter and sat up, mulling over my dream. No, I wouldn't say dream. It was a message. Suddenly, a strong wave of nausea hit me. I flew to the bathroom and bent over the toilet as a mixture of bile and blood poured from my lips. All the food I had recently eaten had already been completely digested, but it seemed I still had some bad blood staying in my stomach from before my ten-year sleep. To be clear, I'm not a vampire, but... well, let's just say I can occasionally see the merit in their unusual diet. After a particularly nasty wave of nausea, I leaned against the cool wall of the bathroom, blood trailing down my chin. I was sick and weak... _Weak_._ So that's why no one's afraid of my power. My power's practically gone. _I grimaced as the image of the vampire from my dream flashed in my mind. Roderick. He was doing this to me.

I pulled the silver pendent of my necklace out from beneath my nightgown and held it protectively in my hands. Tenderly, I traced my fingers over the two dragons that intertwined to form the cross pendent. I stared at it, feeling warmth appear in my eyes at the fond memories it held. "It's times like these when I really miss you, old friend."

"Lily?" I jumped at the voice. Clutching the cross in my hand, I spun around to see D standing in the doorway. His eyes fell to the blood on my chin and a hungry red seeped into his eyes despite himself. _Oh. God. _There in that bathroom, with D's eyes the color of the Nobility, and _his_ cross in my hand, I realized why D seemed so familiar. He was the spitting image of his father.

I scrambled away from him, pressing my back into the wall for the support that I desperately needed. Eyes wide, the tiny part of my brain that _wasn't_ panicking made me mumble, "So that's what the D stands for..."

D frowned. "What was that?"

Snapping out of my daze, I shook my head. "Oh, um..." _Lie! Lie through your teeth!_ "I'm sorry. I'm just not feeling very well." _Because it turns out I've been travelling with Vlad Dracula's son. Vlad's son who _hates _him. _Oh... I knew way more about the Dracula family than I was comfortable sharing. Vlad, the Vampire King, had a son that had been destroying everything connected to Dracula for _centuries_. Now I, someone who was very much connected to Dracula, was sitting in a bathroom with said vengeful son.

I wiped the blood off of my chin, taking a moment to admire D's self-control. _He's just like his father._ I stood shakily and washed my hands in the sink. "I'm alright now. I'm sorry for waking you." D continued to watch me as I cleaned my hands, seeming to not quite believe me. I looked up at his reflection in the mirror and smiled. "Everything's fine. You're always so serious, Dante." Seeing that I was well enough to mock him, D went to the chair facing the window, leaving the bed for me. _Guess he's more of a daytime sleeper. _I looked over at him once more before drifting off, his graceful countenance illuminated by the pale moonlight. _I won't worry about his father and him for now. Besides, what D doesn't know can't hurt him._

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><p>I hope you liked it!<p> 


	4. Chapter 4

Enjoy!

Disclaimer: I don't own D.

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><p>4<p>

The golden afternoon sun glared at me from the sky, brazenly intent upon pulling me from my sleep. I sat up in bed with a yawn, looking lazily about me. "D?" No answer. There wasn't a trace of him in the room, not even some left behind attractiveness on the chair he'd been sitting in. I walked about the room, searching for a note or anything else to tell me where he'd gone. There was only a red piece of clothing folded neatly on the bedside table. Taking the silky velvet in my hands, I unfolded it to see it was a jacket. It was a piece fit for a Noble, with delicate gold stitching that matched its round buttons. I ran my fingers over its soft black lining, mesmerized by its beauty, before tossing the gorgeous thing to the floor. This was no time to be caught up in admiring a jacket. I had been abandoned, and it hurt more than I thought it would.

As I sank back down onto the bed, I chastised myself for the apparent attachment I'd formed on D. _This is unlike you, Lily. You meet people all the time, and you leave people all the time. No use in getting all upset. _I sighed despite my reasonable thinking. I hadn't really minded being alone before, but it looked like I had forgotten what having a companion felt like.

A sudden banging on the door jolted me from my loneliness, and reminded me of more useful emotions. Like anger, for example. "I know you're in there, girl!" came a manly voice from behind the door. _Well that's just dandy! Now the local villagers are all in a fuss. I swear, if they're here to run me out of the city, I'll leave this flippin' place as a ghost town. _

The man banged on the door again. I jerked it open and shrieked "What?" at a man dressed in cheap travelling clothes. Instead of a reply, the man took out a knife and stabbed it into my side. I fell to my knees in front of him with a whimper. _Worst. Day. Ever._

"I saw you yesterday with the bartender. It seems you like to travel with a good bit of money on you." He leaned over me menacingly, his hand still on the knife. "Where is it?"

"I don't have any," I groaned. Hey, it was kind of true. Any money I had was conjured from treasure troves, so _technically_, I didn't have any money on me. The man twisted the blade in my side. _Gah! My... what? My liver? I don't know. My organs! _I spat, "Where would I keep it, you imbecile?"

Looking over my thin nightgown, he made a face that said 'you have a point'. You can't pickpocket someone that doesn't have pockets. He wrenched the knife out of my abdomen, deciding whether or not he should believe me as I kneeled before him. To my relief, I felt the sharp tingling of my wound healing itself. _Good to know I can still do that._ With my side in much better condition, a flash of defiance sparked in my mind. Before my attacker could realize what I was doing, I drew my arm back and then punched him in the crotch as hard as I could. As he crumpled over in pain, I pushed him on his back and crawled on top of him. I only used one hand as I strangled him, using my right to inspect my dress. It now had an ugly gash in it, and the pure white was smeared with blood down the side. "Well that's a fine how-do-you-do!" I snapped. He had ruined a perfectly good dress. I pressed down on his throat even harder.

As his tanned skin turned an unnatural shade of purple, a white flash pierced the air and a wooden needle punctured his temple. I turned to yell at whoever had stolen my kill, "Hey! I had-", but it was D, standing like a tower of beauty next to the teenager that worked at the inn. My scowl quickly melted away as I felt delight swell in my chest at his return. _Not that I'm all that happy to see him or anything, _I reminded myself._ I would have done just fine on my own._

Completely forgetting the dead man, I practically floated off of him to smile at D. However, the pool of his blood regained my attention as I stepped in it with a horrible squishing sound. Lifting my foot up in disgust, I hastily wiped it off on his shirt. "This is a downright mess!" Turning to D and the boy, I added, "What are we gonna do?"

The boy, apparently all too eager to please, quickly chirped, "Oh! I can take care of that little mess. It's no trouble at all. I mean, he was just passing through, anyway. No one will come around looking for him." Pulling a rag out of his back pocket, he walked over to the pooled blood and started wiping at it. As he did this, his eyes constantly darted to mine, as if he were a dog pleading for assurance from his master. I slight twinge of annoyance went through me as I saw D's mouth form a disapproving line in my direction. _What? Like he's never used his good looks to turn someone into an accomplice to murder? _

In gratitude, I smiled at the boy and gave a polite, "Thank you, Tom." Unfortunately, as I showed my approval of him, he promptly swooned. I looked, dumbfounded, to D, who simply looked back, his air of disapproval slightly strengthened by Tom's lack of consciousness. After a moment, I remarked, "That boy just creeps me out."

"Indeed," D replied, carefully stepping over him as he walked over to where I was standing. He noticed the blood on my dress then, and concern spread across his face. "All you alright?" he asked, placing his fingers on where my cut had been. At his gentle touch, I quickly swatted his hand, giggling. D just looked confused and kept his hand where my injury should have been.

"Stop," I laughed, "I'm ticklish!" He carefully took his hand away from me, completely bewildered now. "What? Like you're not?" I looked up past his stone body, his serious mouth, and directly into his frozen, silver eyes. No. That man _definitely_ wasn't ticklish. "Fine. Well then," I placed my hands firmly on my hips, "and just what have you been up to?" D turned from me and walked into our room, gracefully stepping over the blood the continued to spread across the floor.

"There was a vampire attack last night. The bartender told them who I am, so the mayor wanted to see if I'd take the job of hunting it down." _That bartender... I guess a bribe just doesn't cover all that it used to._

"Are you going to?"

"They've got the money to hire me. I'll take the job." D's eyes caught the crumpled up jacket I had thrown on the floor. He picked it up in his slender fingers and looked straight at me. "This was for you."

I quickly looked away, "Oh, um..." I mumbled, knitting my fingers together. "I didn't feel right taking it, thinking you had abandoned me." I glanced at D for less than a second before deciding it was time for a game of "Let's see how long we can avoid eye-contact with D". _Did this rug used to be tan or beige? Cream maybe?_ I felt D take a step toward me and I shut my eyes, having no idea what to expect. When I felt the smoothness of the jacket's silky lining on my shoulders I looked up at him.

"I'm not leaving without saying goodbye." He told me with a look in his eye that said he was telling the truth.

For a moment, I simply stood there and mulled over his words in my head. I analyzed them over and over again before finally asking, "So, does that mean we're best friends now?" I heard a laugh from D's hand before D clenched it shut. I beamed, "We are, aren't we? Don't deny it. It's too late now. I'm makin' you a friendship bracelet."

000

The sky had rapidly melted into an ominous gray, threatening rain at any moment. D and I stood just outside the town's minuscule schoolhouse. The weeds that grew along the porch waited patiently with us wait as we wondered when school would let out.

"What are doing here, again?" I asked D, giving his hand a slight tug. I still hadn't gotten comfortable enough with the villagers to be out and about without some form of security.

"The mayor's daughter goes to school here. Since the locals would prefer it if we didn't stay in town, she offered to show us to the house just outside the city limits." He turned his face to the gloomy sky, and I wondered if he was as affected by the rain as much as others of Noble blood. I smirked at him, seeing an opportunity to tease him.

"Oh? My, that mayor's brave man..." I smiled, waiting for him to take the bait.

"How so?" Suspicion narrowed his eyes slightly.

"Well, I don't think most men would be all too keen on sending their daughters off alone with you," My smile turned crooked as I nudged him in the side. "If you know what I'm sayin'."

Left Hand snickered loudly causing D to shut his hand into a fist and frown disdainfully. "You'll be there," he said, looking down at me. _He sure can make people feel short._

"Oh, sure! Let's just surround you with women! Nothing could possibly happen then!" The soprano ring of the school bell pealed through the quiet afternoon, sending swarms of children into the yard. A waving hand in the crowd caught my attention, and attached to it was the girl I had run into earlier. The girl that had blushed and stammered at the mere sight of D.

**Hm... Why oh why would she be so generous as to help us out? **my sarcastic voice rang through D's head. He jerked his head to look at me, a slight twitch of his eyebrows displaying his surprise. I rolled my eyes at him. **Really, D? Any human with half a brain can learn telepathy. Don't look so shocked. It hurts my feelings. **I pretend pouted.

He turned back to the girl walking towards us and replied,** You just caught me off guard.** I scoffed, then awkwardly tried to play it off as a cough (unsuccessfully) when it confused our new guide. Once she had stopped directly in front of D (a little closer than necessary, in case you were wondering), she smiled a greeting at him and looked towards me. _Oh, great. _

For the most part, my appearance had the same awe-inspiring effect on people as D's. I had my fair share of turning men into blushing, stammering fools, let me tell you. However, on member's of the same gender, I never did have that whole "Spontaneously Gay" thing that I had heard happened with D. Nope, girls just didn't trust me.

"D?" she whined, batting her eyelashes at him. "Aren't you going to introduce us?" She let her hungry eyes linger on him before turning them to me, seeing me as her competition and sizing me up. She was a pretty, sure. The green tie on her uniform made her hazel eyes pop against her light skin, and her brown hair gently brushed at her shoulders. But she had a wicked spark in her eye, and I instantly felt a rush of territorial possessiveness for D.

D turned to me. "Miss Lander,—"

She giggled. "Oh, call me Kade."

"...Kade, this is Lily." Her smile was sickeningly sweet, like what a shark's smile would look like if it had the audacity to smile at you before it killed you. "Lily, this is Kade." I smiled back, holding her eyes with mine. She almost immediately looked away, feeling uncomfortable and vulnerable. _Ha! Suck on that. You can be as competitive as you want, but I can be intimidating as hell!_... Yes, I'm competitive.

Without any further ado, she led us through the dusty streets of the town and to the grassy plains that surrounded it. As the knee-high grass brushed against her, she turned and explained to D the history of the town. Her great-great-grandfather was the Lander that founded Landerville, it turned out, and the position of mayor had been passed down to the oldest son for generations. _Whoop-de-freakin'-doo, you shameless tart_, I thought darkly as she giggled at D's polite "Is that so?". No, I didn't care how fortunate the town was to never have been targeted by the Nobility before, and I certainly didn't care that the town hall was almost one hundred years old. _If I go for her eyes, I don't think D will be able to stop me before I kill her... _

Fortunately for her, the gate of the old house was now just within reach. I sighed at the sight of it, eager to be rid of her company. (Not that I didn't like her, or anything, I just... No. I didn't like her.) Kade walked ahead to unlock the wrought iron gate, which was in remarkably good condition for a house as old as it looked. "Does anyone take care of this place?" I asked, speaking for the first time since our introduction.

"Father sends men up here about every few months. He says that he's not going to let it become an eyesore just because no one lives here." Kade pushed the gate open and motioned for us to step into the yard. "Of course, he never bothers with the inside of the house, so it's probably a total wreck." As D and I walked through the overgrown yard, I looked back to see that Kade was hesitating uncomfortably by the gate.

"Is something wrong?" I asked. Walking with her was bad enough, but if she's going to just stand there, I'd break her nose. She inched away slightly and glanced warily at the house.

"It's haunted," she whispered, partially covering her mouth so the house didn't hear her. "The man that lived in that house got possessed by a demon. It made him kill his wife right before it forced him to kill himself. I wasn't alive at the time, but I heard it was a terrible sight when they came looking for them the next day."

"Uh-hu..." _Is she serious? _"Well, I don't want to ruin your knowledge of the town history, but I highly doubt anyone was possessed by a demon, or that the place is haunted." She stared at me incredulously, not feeling a bit of comfort. I continued lightheartedly, "Really! Oh, people go insane and kill everyone all the time. Plus, if you were dead, why would you want to stick around in the place you died?" Nothing. Not a word of that sunk in, and Kade continued to just _stand _there. Exasperated, I stalked over to her with D stoically in tow and thrust my hand out, "Fine. It's haunted. Now, give me the key so you can run on home where it's safe." She obediently did just that. As soon as I was sure she couldn't hear us anymore, I turned to D and said, "Can you believe that girl?"

"It's not uncommon for people to believe in demonic possessions and ghosts," he replied, gentlemanly as ever.

"Not that! I'm standing right next to you the entire time, and she's all up on you! I tell you what, D, that girl is tryin' to steal you," I narrowed my eyes at her distant figure and muttered, "Dirty man-stealer."

Left Hand snickered at D. "Looks like you've got yourself a girlfriend, D!" D quickly dropped my hand and looked away as if he were embarrassed. Then, in a careful voice, he said, "Lily, I hope you're aware that I don't have feelings for you." As he said that, D clenched his hand shut so that Left Hand's next words were too muffled to make out clearly. I just rolled my eyes.

"Not only did that sound like a bit of a falsification, it is also beside the point, D!" My voice had grown more flustered at D's actions, a bit annoyed with how awkward he got at the thought of my being his girlfriend. I put my hands on my hips and walked over to D so he'd have to look at me. "Ok, first of all, don't look so uncomfortable with the idea of me being your girlfriend. I'm a flippin' catch. Second of all, it doesn't matter if we're not together. What matters is that she thinks your mine and that she can take you. She has got another thing comin' if she thinks she can just saunter on over here and take what's mine."

"But I'm not yours," D corrected softly, wary of the air of pride that had begun to surround me. I shot daggers at him, telling him with my eyes that he had, in fact, said the _wrong_ thing. I could see the cogs turning in his head, as if he were trying to figure out a puzzle. Finally, he added, "which is beside the point."

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><p>Hope you liked it. Please R&amp;R<p> 


	5. Chapter 5

**Author's note: Hello, again. I'm afraid you might call this chapter fluff, or filler, or whatever. Or you might call it one of my favorite chapters. (It's in the top five, at least.)**

**Either way, enjoy!**

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><p>5<p>

The dead owner had been a very rich man before his unfortunate loss of sanity. He had asked for a house of beautiful design, and its exterior greatly resembled a small English manor. The interior, in its prime, was not to be outdone by the outer walls. Both stories had dark, hardwood flooring and gracefully high ceilings. Sadly, a sea of dust now covered the floor, and cobwebs dominated the ceiling and the once beautiful chandeliers attached to them.

"Well, this isn't so bad," I remarked, standing just outside the door. I carefully removed my new velvet coat and placed it on the railing of the porch. The great outdoors was probably cleaner than the inside of that house. Walking back to the door, I carefully stepped into the inch of dust that was waiting for me. A chill ran along my spine as it squished between my toes. _Ew..._

D silently walked around me, the grace of a dancer visible in every step. "This place should probably be condemned. I'm not sure you should be in here." He slowly continued into what must have been the living room at some point. Its walls had all faded to the same ugly gray as the grime that covered the windows.

"Nonsense!" I waltzed over to him, slightly cringing at each disgusting step in the sea of dust. "This is a test of my abilities. I shall do what I was trained to do!" I declared with pride and spirited hand motions. Nothing like a bit of theatrics to get your point across.

"Live in filth?" D asked, his eyes on the rotting animal in the fireplace.

"Aren't you a bit old for an attitude?" I retorted. Hypocritical? Yes. But there's only room for one persnickety fellow in this dynamic duo. Even though he was kind of funny. _So... He's clever. I guess I don't need to worry about him being slow. For now. _"No..." I began, pausing to make sure he was listening, " I was trained to marry a prince. So! Not only am I a woman of many professions and talents, I'm also a model housewife." I then raised my chin and folded my hands neatly in front of myself to portray what a loving and well-behaved wife I was supposed to be.

"What are you going to do?" D asked, serious as ever. I felt myself deflate from my pose with the disappointment his answer caused. Honestly, I could turn into a phoenix and do a river dance and he'd still be as solemn as ever. Stupid dhampir.

"All work and no play makes D a dull boy," I muttered darkly at his severity. D showed his confusion with me by a twitch of his eyebrows. _At least we communicate._ "Never mind. What's important is that I need to clean. So go away." D continued to stand in the middle of the room, which, seeing as I had work to do, was also right in the middle of my way. I marched over to him and snatched his hand up. Dragging him to the door, I huffed, "Honestly, D! I swear, you'd just stand in the same spot your entire life if people didn't give you somewhere to go." I shoved him out the door, and D turned to face me, looking slightly flustered for once. "Go on!" I shooed at him with my hand. "Don't you have vampires to hunt? Go do that for a few hours." As he silently began to walk towards the gate, I noticed how dark the clouds blanketing the sky had gotten. I shouted after him, "And come home if it starts to rain! You shouldn't be out in that kind of weather!"

D merely lifted his left hand to acknowledge that he had heard me. Mockingly, Left Hand shouted back, "Yes, dear!"

000

The hours had passed quickly. In that time I had successfully returned the old house to its former glory. The dark floors gleamed under the sparkling light of the chandeliers, and the Persian rug that had been hidden under the sea of dust lay regally between the expensive furniture and fireplace. I had even gotten to clean the upstairs, making the bathrooms sparkle and washing some -ahem- suspicious stains from the sheets. Murder-suicides are so messy.

Rather satisfied with myself, I crouched down on the rug, building up the fire. Once it began to roar to an almost intimidating degree, I stuck my hand into the center of it. A sigh of content escaped my lips as I watched the power of the fire weaken and become mine. It wasn't much, and there wasn't a single chance that it would last, but I felt a million times better having it. It made the odds of my dropping dead from sheer power loss a great deal less likely, which was nice to know. However, despite the comfort of having my hand in the fireplace, I wasn't completely content. Sure, there was still a particularly unpleasant vampire chasing after me, and stealing my power as he did it, but that wasn't anywhere near as important as the current problem. It had been raining for an hour, and D still hadn't come back.

_Stupid dhampir. Just comes and goes as he pleases. _With a huff, I moved away from the fire and reached for my velvet jacket. The place was certainly clean enough for me to wear it, and it did a splendid job of covering the unsightly gash-and-blood combination I had on my nightdress. I really needed my old clothes back. Finally running out of things to do, I sat down and waited for D to come home. It felt unnatural to wait on someone, even to have someone to wait for. I wasn't sure how I felt about it, so I just stuck the feeling away with all the other emotions I couldn't comprehend. Sensitive people thought they had it bad. Puh-lease, I didn't even know what half the emotions I felt even were.

Eventually, I sensed someone on the porch. Seeing as I hadn't even heard a creek on the decrepit steps, I knew it had to be D. Flying up from my seat on the couch, I dashed towards the door and flung it open. There he was, that delinquent, unpunctual vampire hunter, standing right outside the threshold with his hand still poised to open the door. "You're late," I declared. Letting his hand drop, he merely stepped onto the threshold and waited for me to move out of the way. I gasped, finding his actions even more outrageous than his tardiness. "D! What's wrong with you? You can't just walk in here like that after I cleaned this entire house! You're soaking wet, and _those_," I pointed accusingly at his mud-caked boots, "those are _not_ coming inside this house."

Neither of us moved for a moment, D looking down at me with less than an inch of space between us. I glared back and held my ground. "Oh, don't try to use your super-sexy gaze to get your way with me, Dorian," I snapped. The only response was a twitch of D's lips and a snicker from Left Hand. I refused to back down until, slowly, D stepped away from the threshold. "Good!" I agilely stepped with him and snatched his hat from his head and shook it off. Placing the best hat ever created on my head, I reached up and moved close to him so I could begin removing his cloak. As my hands deftly worked at the clasps on his shoulders, I heard the beating of his heart fall into an irregular rhythm for a moment, before returning to normal as I moved away from him. _Huh. The rain must be affecting him poorly._ After removing his boots (he doesn't wear socks, in case you were wondering), I hung up his hat and cloak and led him into the living room. While it's true his hat and cloak had taken most of the rain, he still looked rather wet, and his hair had miraculously managed to become tangled and soaked. My model housewife instincts kicking in, I left him by the fireplace and went off to make some tea. It wasn't until I had brought it to him that I considered the thought that perhaps he didn't drink tea. D being polite as he was, however, accepted it with a quiet, "Thank you."

His hair completely dry now, he sat down on the couch to silently drink his tea. My instincts still weren't satisfied, though, and I dashed off to grab something from the upstairs bathroom. Upon my return, D placed his empty cup on the coffee table, and I sat beside him on the couch. Refusing to be embarrassed by what I was about to do, I took the comb I had taken from the bathroom and ran it through D's tangled hair. He visibly became rigid at the touch of the comb and said, "What are you doing?"

"Combing your hair," I replied, nonchalantly. Oh my goodness. Silky didn't even begin to describe it.

"Why?"

"Because it's tangled."

"Hm..." came his thoughtful reply. There was silence for a few moments, the only sounds the crackling of the fire and the swish of the comb. God, I wanted to braid his hair _sooo_ bad. As I struggled to maintain my self-control, D broke the silence by asking, "Do you always take care of people like this?"

Now it was my turn to become uncomfortable. _Actually, most of the time I kill people. _"Well..." I struggled to think of the best thing to say, "I thought you might need to be taken care of for once." D seemed to ponder that for a while before finally relaxing and leaning back slightly into my hands. _Another victory in the fight for friendship. _I silently beamed, ecstatic to make my new companion content in any way. After a few more moments, the comb was completely forgotten and I simply used by fingers to comb through his lustrous hair, the crackling of the fire and the swishing of his hair the only sounds.

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><p><strong>I hope you liked it, and thank you so much for the reviews!<strong>


	6. Chapter 6

Yes, I know. It's been a while. Honestly, I tried to abandon this for a bit, and when I decided to come back, I couldn't remember how to write it... Yeah... Anyway, it's a bit on the rough side, but I hope I'll get into the swing of things and make a proper story out of this. Enjoy!

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><p>6<p>

Time passed quickly after that, and, eventually, so did the rain. With D's hair in my fingers, a voice called Common Sense rang out in my mind.

'Hey, Lily,' it said.

'Oh, hey, Common Sense,' I replied. 'What's up?'

'You know… Nothing much. I was just wondering, what the hell are you doing?!' Common Sense screamed.

'What? I don't understand. It's my job to—'

'No,' the voice interrupted. 'That was a long time ago. It's not your job to take care of _anyone._ Especially not some pretty boy lone wanderer we barely know! Now get your hands off his effeminate hippy hair and act your age!'

Ok, fine. Being immortal can get a little bit lonely. You'd talk to yourself, too… Don't judge me. Either way, I removed my hands from his "effeminate hippy hair".

"So!" I chirped gracelessly, eager to talk to someone that wasn't, well, me. "How about those vampires, huh? The rain's stopped! You should go hunt them! I hear their super exciting at night!"

D stood slowly, the minutest furrowing of his brow displaying how odd he found my sudden awkwardness. Hey, him and me both. So, yes, he did bear some resemblance to a sex god with his dark hair, silver eyes, and don't even get me started on that body… Ahem. Still, I'm an adult. I do not go all handsy schoolgirl on every hunk of burnin' love dhampir I meet. Besides, he's probably making me do it with some kind of evil vampire magic. The jerk.

"Ok!" I finally chimed. "As much as I'm diggin' the whole silent brooding thing," _Lord give me strength _"it's not getting anything done. So you just stay there and look pretty, and I'll go catch us a vampire." With that, I practically ran out the door, more willing to face a vampire than another second with D. After a few minutes of walking, however, D was right beside me. (Showing up out of nowhere like that is a perfect way to give someone a heart attack, by the way.)

"You shouldn't go wandering about at night," D stated. He didn't look at me, but at the edge of the forest we were approaching.

"Oh?" I answered. "Is the big bad wolf going to eat me up?" _Ah… It's good to see how quickly attraction turns into sarcasm. I am a pinnacle of emotional health, today._

D waited for a few children to grow old and die, the reminded me, "We're not hunting a wolf; we're hunting a vampire."

"I know," I stopped to give him a why-were-you-so-tragically-born-without-a-sense-of-humor? look. "It's a character: the big bad wolf. He'll huff, and he'll puff, and… never mind. You're hopeless." _I really need to make some friends my age._

"The Three Little Pigs, right?" a coarse voice asked. I turned to D accusingly.

"You're left hand is better read than you, Dallas. I know, I know! Why read when you can just grow up to be a trophy wife? But still…" My charming wit ran out, however, as D started to give me dagger eyes. I don't care who you are, that man can just be scary, sometimes.

"No, no. He reads." Apparently, Lefty wasn't that scared of D's little "I shall feast upon your soul" vibe. "He's just too busy being a pain in the ass to remember any of it."

"Snap!" I burst, raising my hand for a high-five to reward Lefty's excellent burn. However, I then remember that Lefty _was _ a hand, and that it would be more of a slap to the face. Also, he was attached to D, who probably didn't believe in high-fives. And he still looked mad. Maybe madder. "Too far?" I asked. He continued to glare. Well, I assumed he did. I was having a staring contest with the forest floor. It was a close game, but D obviously wasn't backing down. It wasn't my fault he was so sensitive about people being completely disrespectful.

"Alright! Fine!" I stamped my foot, which, while immature, was a step up from cringing in fear. "You know, being immortal means never having to say you're sorry, but whatever! Sorry. Baby. Now will you _please _quit staring? It's flustering."

D took his eyes away from me and began walking forward again. He always gets his way. Spoiled half-breed.

"Anyway… Do we have a name for this vampire?"

D was quiet for a moment. I mean, he continued to be quiet for a moment, as if thinking, then replied, "No, not that I know of."

"Oh…" See, I was fully aware that D was hunting down his own relatives, but I assumed it was just the loyal soldiers of Daddy Dearest. I guess it was more of a free-for-all thing going on. _What kind of half-assed parenting did Vlad put him through?_

000

It was a few hours away from dawn when D and I stopped in front of a wide hole that looked very much like an entrance to a vampire's lair. I conjured a small ball of fire into my hand and dropped it into the pit. _This is why we hoard fire. So many uses. Like telling us that the gaping hole that leads to the vampire's lair is really, _really _deep._

"How did you do that?" D asked. _Oh, so he can play Mr. Mysterious, but I'm supposed to just tell him every little thing._

"Oh… you know. It's… um…" Shoot. I never really had to explain it, before. "I don't really know. I guess it's like a magical science… thing. Look it up in a Necronomicon, or something."

D did his equivalent of a sigh, which was remaining quiet. When I think about it, I bet D could have entire conversations with just varying levels of deliberate silence. "Wait here," he said.

"Oh, Donnie, do you really think I spend my immortality playing it safe? Nobody does that." I turned to wink at him before hopping into the pit. Nothing like falling a couple hundred feet to get your kicks.

"Do you ever consider the consequences of you actions before doing something?" D asked, landing silently behind me. I pretended to be confused.

"What's a consequence?" I joked. He didn't laugh, even though I'm sure that's one joke he understood. Whatever. I looked around at the tunnel we had landed in. My eyes weren't quite as accustomed to the darkness as a vampire's, but the ball of the light from the fire allowed me to see that the tunnel spread out in two directions for quite some distance. "Here's an idea! How about we split up? We'd find the vampire a million times more quickly that way."

D considered it for a moment, then turned away to begin searching his side of the tunnel. Following his example, I turned away from him to begin searching mine.


	7. Chapter 7

I know, another one already! I'm just on a little bit of a writing streak, right now. Don't forget to tell me what you think!

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><p>7<p>

As I walked through the tunnel, fire in hand, I began to realize how strange the vampire D and I were hunting must have been. For starters, everything was covered in dust. Even if the vampire were just passing through town, he would have at least cleaned up the place. One of the easiest ways to spot a vampire is to look for whoever has the most immaculate hygiene. Seriously, I don't know what it is with them; they're all just so… clean. Also, he killed his first victim in one night. How can he call himself a vampire if he doesn't play with his food? Those two things were so unlike a vampire, and I was sure I knew what it meant from my days as a vampire hunter… If only I could remember what it was. To be honest, I was never serious about hunting vampires, anyway. I mean, not like D, who I think may technically be a serial killer. It was mostly just when they stepped out of line or Vlad and I were fighting. Fun fact about who can be a bigger pain in the ass, Vlad or D: Vlad wins. That's probably only because Vlad actually talked, though.

The tunnel eventually led to a much more open space, and I tossed the ball of fire up in the air, willing it to stay there so I could see the chamber. I was in a laboratory, as equally untouched as the rest of the lair. I was beginning to wonder if there even was a vampire in this place when saw something slinking in the shadows. "Hello?" I called out. "I know you're there." I tried to find the dark figure again, but anything past the faint light of the flame was completely black. "Listen, I'm just trying to help. There's a hunter looking for you; you need to run."

"Oh, Lady Lily, you take such good care of your loyal subjects," a sarcastically honeyed voice whispered in my ear. I span around to find a horrifying face inches from mine.

"Jesus!" I cried out, recoiling at the sight of it. _Well, I guess that proves we're not dealing with a vampire. _The man who owned that hideous face was obviously insulted by my disgust, and he crossed his arms and glared, digging his dirty fingernails into his jacket. Then, a sadistic spark coming to his pupil-less, yellow eyes, he decided to punish me by taking my face in one of his hands and wrapping his other hand around my body, pulling me into an embrace. Everything about it, from the feel of his hand on my face to the scent of his breath, had the sensation of being cradled by swamp of decay.

"Oh, Mistress," he purred, "you mustn't be so displeased to see your faithful Luka, who has done so much to talk to you." He squeezed me even tighter, moving his hand to press the overstretched skin of his gaunt cheek against mine in an insincere display of affection. "It was _such_ a bother faking that vampire attack, but I knew my dear Lady Lily would choose protecting one of her vampires over playing house with that _dirty _little half-breed. _Honestly_, Mistress, why _are _you lowering yourself like this? If the Sacred Ancestor knew what you were up to…"

I shoved him away, causing him to cackle at my anger. He flicked his tongue across his teeth, a habit I particularly hated because of the attention it drew to how tightly his lips had to stretch to cover them. That, combined with his gaunt cheeks and sunken eyes gave him the overall appearance of a corpse. "You don't have a Sacred Ancestor, you mutant. Vampires created you in a lab to see if they could make humans want to gouge out their own eyes. If Vlad were to find out about anything that I do, I would still have more favor with him than you will in your entire existence!"

Luka pretended to look bored by picking at the dirt under his fingernails with the goat horns that emerged from his wild black hair. Ever since we had been introduced, he had made a habit of making me lose my temper, and then pretending to be disappointed by my lack of self-control. Flicking his tail at the shadows that pooled around his feet like fog, he quietly replied, "Your temper is so undignified, Mistress. Please don't forget that I'm merely trying to make sure you remember who you are. When I find you lazing about with a dhampir, it makes me wonder if you even care about what Roderick's been up to."

"Roderick? How long have you been following me around, exactly?" I didn't quite care that he'd been watching D and I. Servants of the vampires have no place to pass judgment, but if he knew about Roderick, that meant that he knew about my being under a sleeping curse for ten years. I didn't see anything wrong with killing him if he had just left me there.

"Now, Lady Lily, I see that look in your eyes. I _did_ try to find you, you know. You're just so _weak_, it's like you don't even exist. No one can sense you." He walked around me, shaking his head in discontent as if to signal his grief over my fall from power. _What a dick_. "When you disappeared, Roderick started claiming that he'd killed you. He gave this as proof." He handed me a small book from his coat pocket. My journal. "Nobody read it! I mean, maybe a _few _pages here and there to authenticate it, but we were mostly too concerned with who would take your place. Roderick, of course, was the first to volunteer. "

"So, that's it then. Roderick claims he killed me, so he becomes king. Doesn't anyone know it's not supposed to work like that? Vlad was king, and when he disappeared I was already named his heir to the throne. I didn't choose an heir, but that doesn't mean it just goes to whoever kills me first." I pinched the bridge of my nose. The politics of vampires is so stressful, mostly because of all the murder. It can be a bit excessive at times. _And to think, this whole thing could have been avoided if Vlad had just stuck to tradition. I should have told him to give it to his son. Boom. Problem solved. None of this even happens. Of course, if D was the Vampire King, he'd probably make a law that required all vampires to kill themselves… Well, we can't make everyone happy. _"I don't want you to tell anyone that I'm alive. I can't be sure who's already joined Roderick. And track down my things. I can't very well face him in a nightgown."

"Of course, Mistress," Luka answered. "As for your belongings, I believe I already know where they are. There are rumors that the Barbarois gathered everything you left behind and hid it within their city. Given how loyal they've always been, I'd say it's almost certain."

"Yes, I'd say so, too. Thank you, Luka."

With thanks as his signal to leave, Luka gathered the shadows around his feet into his hands. Taking a low bow, he responded, "I _live _to serve, Mistress," then wrapped the shadows around him and was gone.

000

A few hours later, I had just sat down in the living room of the house on the hill when D walked in. "The proud hunter returns!" I greeted. "How did it go?"

"He wasn't there," he answered, "and neither were you." D walked silently to one the chairs and gently placed himself in it. He was so strange to watch. It was like he was a ghost every time he moved and a statue every time he stopped. Pure motion and absolute stillness in one finely wrapped package.

"Oh, me? Yeah, I figured you're a big, strong man. You don't need me to do your job for you. Besides, I was able to get so many things accomplished today." I stretched out in the chair and placed my feet on the coffee table to display what I was referring to. "Look at that! Pants! Shoes, as well. There's even a horse out back and rock candy in my pocket." I reached my hand in my pocket to retrieve some, and felt the soft leather of my journal beside it. I allowed the smile to slip from my face, but only for a moment. I'm sure most people are rather protective of their journals, what with it containing their innermost thoughts and all, but this was a little bit more than that. While I usually saw my little journal's infinite number of pages as a wonderful way to save space when writing about my day-to-day life, I then saw it as the largest collection of evidence linking me to D's father. I felt like a murderer that had not only been caught with the murder weapon, but also with the body and a step-by-step retelling of how they had done it. _No big deal, _I reminded myself. _Just don't give D a reason to search my pockets. _I shook my head, and offered the candy to D, pretending not to have a guilty conscience. "Would you like some?"

"No," he answered quietly, then added as an afterthought, "We need to leave town."

"Leave? Why?" I asked. I had a feeling I knew.

"One of the computers in the laboratory has been used recently," he started. _By the "vampire", right, D? Oh, please tell me you figured out where he's going. _"It seems that the vampire was merely passing through. His main objective appears to be the village of the Barbarois."

"You don't say…" _Checkmate. Ten points to the girl that can successfully plant evidence for the great Vampire Hunter D. _Oh, I know, I know. No healthy relationship can be built on lies, and manipulation is just _asking_ for trouble. But then again, getting to the Barbarois was for the best… Well, the best for _me_, and there was no way I'd make it all the way there by myself with Roderick and his allies up to no good. Besides, it was only a little lie, just enough to steer D in the right direction. What else could I do? Say 'Hey, I need you to get me to the Barbarois so I can take back the throne your dad gave me.'? For some reason, I feel like that would make D a little bit suspicious of where my loyalties lied. This was definitely the best option, and what D didn't know couldn't hurt him.

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><p>There you have it, then. Also, I've been thinking about adding excerpts of Lily's journal, just for some background and life with Vlad sort of things. Does anyone have any thoughts?<p> 


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